Furbabies

So I got home tonight and received some sad news from my mom. My Grandfather and Aunts cat died today. She was 18 years old. No matter how old a pet is, it is still very sad when they pass away. Most people with pets feel as though they are a major part of the family. For some, pets are their children. I have always been one to think of my pets as children. We call them Furbabies.

Every night when I go to bed my cat Chloe lays on my chest. Now you must know that this is the cat that goes to nobody but me. They say that cats choose a person for them. Well, she has definitely picked me.

When she was only a kitten she always slept on my hair. When she could not get to my hair, she would cry and follow me looking for a way up. If I bent over far enough she would jump on my back. Chloe would then start to march and wrap my hair around her nose. Before I knew it, she would be cleaning my hair. Now once at a vet appointment, she started to do this. The vet looked at me and said, "She thinks you are her mommy." My question is, "How long will she do this?" His response was, that she would grow out of it.

It is now 11 years later and she still cleans my hair. It is not that often anymore, not that I minded. Actually I was honored that Chloe thought of me like that. I am more than 'her person' I am her mother.

Even though it bothers me a little, I can understand why people think she is a snob. She is a one person cat and I can respect that when I meet other cats that are the same. Some call her a princess or Queen, which she is. To me she is my monkey. I have called her that since she was a kitten because of the noises she makes. Chloe is also a talker. If I ask her if she loves me, she will answer with squinted eyes and a little smile. Of course she is answering, "yes!" I can read her mind to the point of it being scary. I also have taken the time to get to know her. There are some people who just do not take the time to even care for their pets. This makes me wonder why they even have them in the first place. I get so much joy and affection from my pets that they brighten any crappy day. Pets do not care if we get out of our pajamas, they don't care what we look like, they don't care if we have coffee breath....they love us no matter what. People are not like that. People are very judgmental and materialistic. Who would not want unconditional love from such beautiful creatures that God has created? Ya think maybe it's those crabby pants that do not have much love for themselves? That is what I think but it is just my opinion.

Below is a little poem I wrote for my Chloe. I will pray tonight for the saddness to be lifted from my Aunt and my Grandfather who lost their Furbaby today. And I will be even more grateful for the time I have with mine.

Chloe
Your voice fills the air when I enter the house.
Telling me of your day sleeping and playing with your mouse.
You 'happy feet' my bellybefore laying on my lap,
and because I am so ticklish all I can do is laugh.
I watch you chasing squirrels and leaves outside,
which one you want first, you cannot decide.
Besides Chloe, we may call you
monkey, princess kitty or even spunky.
From the sink you want fresh water,
and you need your special kind of food,
And if these things are not available,
you get into a 'talk to the paw'kind of mood.
You are a bathing beauty
a true princess to the end,
but you are also my very best furry friend.

Blogger-want-a-be's and Info on Me!

Now that I know I have Blogger-want-a-be's faithfully following my blogs......LOL! I feel compelled to write even more...thanks ladies! Now you are being inspirations to me! Thanks for making me laugh today! I am glad that the things I write inspire you. Thank you for telling me that since I had no clue what I was doing for others by writing. Well, I lied, I knew from what my mom has said but because she is my mom.....you understand. She has mentioned that I need to tell people that if they are going to read my blogs, they will need a box of tissues. Here I was thinking this entire time that my mom was the only one reading them. Thank you for keeping up with my life...I may use you as references when my mind goes.


Because it is already 11:26pm and I am very tired from being up with Makenna most of the night last night, I am going to copy and paste an email I filled out. This way, I feel better having written something but I can now go to bed. Ladies, have a wonderful weekend if I do not see you. It was a great time tonight....I hope you liked the class....you know who you are....LOL!

Here it is......

1. What time did you get up this morning? 8am
2. Diamonds or pearls? Diamonds
3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? The Dark Knight.....awesome movie!
4. What is your favorite TV show? Always will be Friends
5. What do you usually have for breakfast? Coffee
6. What is your middle name? Renee
7. What food do you dislike? Seafood
8. What is your favorite CD at moment? Pink's new one however, I know it would be Nickleback if I could borrow it again someday.....hint hint, Jenny.
9. What kind of car do you drive? A soccer mom mini van...come on you know it's hot!
10. Favorite sandwich? does a hogie count?
11. What characteristic do you despise? selfishness, liars, greety people
12. Favorite item of clothing? PJ's
13. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go? Bermuda
14. Favorite brand of clothing? Old Navy
15. Where would you retire to? Wherever my family is, I don't want to be far
16. What was your most recent memorable birthday: All my birthdays are memorable
17. Favorite sport to watch? none
18. Furthest place you are sending this? Texas
19. Person you expect to send it back first? Darn, I cannot pick Jenny since she sent this to me.......hmmm, my mom
20. When is your birthday? 07/27/73
21. Are you a morning person or a night person? Night .....definitely night....do ya see the time??
22. What is your shoe size? 8
23. Pets? One bunny Thumper, one dog Diego, 3 cats Zoe, Chloe and Precious.
24. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share with us? I found out people actually follow my blog!! WHOO HOO!
25. What did you want to be when you were little? Funny thing, a hairdresser....how did I end up doing nails?
26. How are you today? great!
27. What is your favorite candy? chocolate
28. What is your favorite flower? Iris, Carnations, Gerber Daisies, I could go on....
29. What is a day on the calendar you are looking forward to? The day I open my Inn
30. What's your full name? Amy Renee Musser
31. What are you listening to right now? Friends on TV
32. What was the last thing you ate? sausage and eggs burritos......thanks for dinner Jenny!
33. Do you wish on stars? Used to
34. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Purple
35. How is the weather right now? COLD!!!!
36. The first person you spoke to on the phone today? My nieghbor Diane (very normal start of my day)
37. Favorite soft drink? don't normally drink it but I would say if I do, it would be rootbeer
38. Favorite restaurant? Texas Road House, TGI Fridays, and lots more
39. Real hair color? dark brown
40. Favorite toy as a child? go-cart, motorcyle......believe it or not I was a Tom boy all the way!
41. Favorite season? Summer
42. Hugs or kisses? Hugs
43. Chocolate or Vanilla? CHOCOLATE (if you have been to my store, you will see it everywhere!)
44. Coffee or tea? Coffee in the morning, green tea during the day
45. Do you want your friends to email you back? Yes
46. When was the last time you cried? Tuesday when I heard about Jamie's Grammy.
47. What is under your bed? Maybe a sock or two, a family of dust bunnies
48. What did you do last night? Played with Makenna, started brainstorming ideas on a scrapbook I am working on
49. What are you afraid of? losing loved ones, although I know they will still be near
50. Salty or sweet? sometimes both
51. How many keys on your key ring? 5 or more
52. How many years at your current job? almost 2 months baby!
53. Favorite day of the week? Sunday
54. How many towns have you lived in? 3?
55. Do you make friends easily? Yes!
56. How many people will you send this to? Too tired to count! Besides, I am posting this on my blog.

Learn the Power of Forgiveness

I held my first Scrapbooking for Beginners Class today and I was the teacher. It went really well. Hard to believe that at one time in my life I wanted to throw up and pass out at the thought of standing up in front of people. My how things change.

This elderly lady was one of the 7 people that came into the class today. She has never scrapbooked before but really wants to put together a scrapbook of her granddaughter. When the class was over, she stayed behind to ask some questions. Because she was new at this and had a deadline to get this done she was anxious to get started right away. While we were talking, she was very emotional. At first I didn't understand why talking about her granddaughter had made her seem so sad. We were going through the pictures of her granddaughters childhood trying to pick the ones that she wanted in the scrapbook and filter out the huge pile. While we were going through the pictures, she was telling me about each moment. You could tell that this woman totally admired and adored her granddaughter. In conversation she told me that her granddaughter had undergone a few heart surgeries during her life. Her granddaughter is only 24.

When this woman mentioned that her granddaughter was getting married in April she stressed how important it was for her to get this scrapbook done in time for her wedding. Without any experience, I could tell that she didn't see that happening. Gently I put my hand on her shoulder and told her that she needed to come in during the week and I would help her with whatever she needed. She was so grateful and thanked me many times. As she was getting ready to leave, she apologized for being so emotional. She then told me that she is very sad that her daughter and her granddaughter are estranged. In fact, she knows that her daughter will not be at the wedding and it breaks her heart. This woman expressed how much she believes in forgiveness and how life is too short to carry anger for so long.

My heart broke. All I could think of is how fortunate I am to not only have a wonderful relationship with my mom but to also have had a long time being so close to my grandmother before she passed away. I could feel that this woman wants her daughter and her granddaughter to make amends before anything were to happen to any one of them. Her granddaughter having heart problems has her even more scared of less time for forgiveness to come about.

My hopes to help this woman create a scrapbook of her granddaughter is only a minor thing I can do to help her. What I want to do is wrap my arms around her and tell her everything will be ok. One thing I cannot stand is to see someone emotionally hurting. She feels so trapped in the middle between two people she loves with no way of bringing them together. Tonight I will pray for her and for her daughter and granddaughter. If the relationship has no chance of changing, maybe at least the grandmother can be freed of her sadness. We all need to take to heart the relationships we have and know that we will not live forever. Do we really want to leave this earth angry, feeling guilt, emptiness, sadness, and being stubborn when we had so much time and many opportunities to change things?

What I am thankful for today....

Today I am blogging about what I am thankful for. I am mostly doing this to feel better since I am tired and crabby. I am not getting into it since I know it is me. So, here it is....hopefully it helps...

• I have my own business which allows me to do what I want, with my business and my home life.
• My friends and their silly emails, great advise, and lots of laughs.
• My family, including my pets.
• Coffee.....Lord knows I needed it this morning!
• Butterscotch Krimpets.....just had one......YUMMY!
• Time I have spent with loved ones.
• Lion's Club breakfasts, in which I went to this morning....
• The 41 degree weather we had today.
• My husband 'getting handier by the day'.
• My bed...which I want to be in right now.
• Candles because they symbolize peace (for me) and smell soooooo good. LOVE PARTYLITE!

Now I feel better! I am telling ya, if ever you are not feeling 'great', you need to write or think about the things you are thanful for. It helps you think happier thoughts and gets your mind off the other crap. LOL!

A good day

Today was a good day for me. Nothing exciting really happened besides that my photography class went really well. I think I am considering it a good day because I was fortunate enough to see a lot of people and talk to people who really mean a lot to me. Some of my best friends were here to take the class then some stayed and scrapbooked with me....it was just like it used to be in my dining room before I had my store. My mom was here helping put out retail, answer the phone, etc

I had a nice talk with my friend Melinda on the phone when everyone left. I would say old boss, but she hates when I call her that. She is the one I have to thank for teaching me everything I know about having a successful business. Well, her and her husband are both to be credited. I have seen her go through so much crap, so many wonderful times, meet some awesome people, then of course meet some real idiots. However, Melinda never lets anything get her down. Her and her husband always manage to keep everything together. They have always achieved every goal they have dreamed of. I admire both of them very much.

I have to say that when I first met Melinda I was very intimidated by her. She was so strong, and very to the point. She never held anything back either. I however, was not very strong and I never told anyone how I really felt because I hated confrontation. Being around Melinda for over 13 years, changed me A LOT! I know she has changed a lot too. Both of us managed to meet somewhere in the middle over time. I am now very strong, I do not allow people to take advantage of me anymore, and I go after what I want. Melinda, is a lot more easy going and now she thinks before she speaks.....at least most of the time....LOL!

If it wasn't for Melinda and Marty, I would not own my own business. I also would not be the person I am today. Tonight on the phone with her she actually mentioned that she was envious of me. I am looking back at the conversation thinking......envious of me? I always was envious of her! I guess full-filling your dreams isn't always exactly the way you pictured it once you have achieved it. She has mentioned many times in the past how she wishes it was just her and I at a small salon like it used to be. She did the hair, I did the nails. Now, I am referring to her spa-salon as Steel Magnolias. If you are not sure what I am referring too, you need to rent the movie. Mirror Images has gone from a small apartment to a farm house. I hope you understand the metephor. This is what she has always wanted. Maybe Melinda was not as lucky as I am to have such a mentor when she first started out. Now as my mentor she tells me all the time that I'd better learn from all the crap that she has had to deal with. At least we can laugh about it.

Personally I think that negative people have a lot to do with someone being unhappy in their lives. Once we filter out the bad, we have more room for the good. There are many people who I once looked to as a friend until I realized how miserable they made me. It wasn't until I got rid of them that my life actually picked up and got better. If you are living your dream and still are not happy, then something needs to change. It doesn't have to be drastic. I know Melinda will achieve the happiness she is lacking and fall in love with her dream again. Why? Because she always achieves everything she sets her mind to do. And, she is very lucky to have Marty who is by her side the entire way.

Today is a good day because I know that I helped her feel better by being the kind of friend that she has always been to me. And today, I was reminded of how lucky I am to have had her in my life. If it wasn't for that little salon that she started her dream in, her and I would not be where we are today. I know she wants a time machine to go back to a less stressful and simpler time. But, I also know that she would only be happy there for a little while.

Today I am thankful for my friends and for all of the advise, support, laughter and love that they have given me throughout the years. I am entirely grateful for all the experience I have had working with Melinda and becoming very close to her and her family. If you open your mind and your heart and let go of all things negative, you have the opportunity to learn and experience great things.

Laughter is the best medicine

As I look back to the tough times in my life, I recall a lot of laughter. I lived with my friend Jamie for a while and her room-mate Amy when I was going through my divorce. I remember laughing until my ribs hurt. We would sit and talk, play games, watch silly movies and just laugh. I seriously think that is how I made it through without jumping off a bridge.

Jamie sat here with me the one evening when Jeremy was at a hockey game with her husband. We ended up laughing so hard that tears were coming out our eyes. And, all we were doing was talking! We need more times like that.

My friend Jenny laughs at everything. And, she is one of the most positive people I know. I clearly see why her life is so much different than someone who is negative. We all have our bad days, but it is how we chose to deal with it that makes the difference.

If I ever need a pick-me-up, I call or email a friend. I will send a quick silly message, even if I am not feeling silly. Or, I will just let them know I need some cheering up. It works every time.

Recently I was faced with a situation that I was really not mentally prepared for.....at all. In fact it was a very sore subject that I had tried to forget about and not deal with. In a major panic I emailed and called my closest friends. I even ran to my neighbors house to vent after venting to my sister-in-law. Almost everyone had all positive things to say. Their love and support helped me more than I can express. In some emails were things that made me crack up in laughter. Others were a combination of inspiration, advise and support. Of course I kept reading the ones that would make me laugh. It feels so good to be able to laugh off what seems a horrible situation. Now I can say that I am through the situation, over it and moved on. It is amazing the ease one can feel once they let go of something they have carried with them for most of their life. Laughter is what helped me deal and get over it.

I get these inspirational quotes sent to me everyday through email from The Secret. Today's was: Be loyal to what you love, be true to the earth, fight your enemies with passion and laughter.-Edward Abbey

Laughter truly is the best medicine.

Writers Block

For those of you who like to write, you already know what it is like to suffer from writers block. Well, this is why I have not written in a few days. I wonder if my grandfather had this problem often. For me, it could be years that I go without writing. However, I was trying to do this daily. And, I am trying to keep this all positive...

However, my morning was not so positive. I woke up earlier than I needed to because my cat needed water and decided to meow as loud as she could in my ear. I got out of bed with a headache.....and found out that my dog had peed all over the couch. My husband and I have no idea why he did this. Going through Gavin's backpack, I saw that he had two tests with much lower grades than normal. After having a tearful chat with him, he was the one in tears, I got him off to school. Knowing that Makenna didn't go to bed until later last night, I figured I would have time to throw these cushions in the laundry and get a shower. I managed to get a shower. However it wasn't long after, when I heard little feet. Then I hear her crying at the top of the steps. My thought is....wonderful...she woke up way too early.

So, I sat down after getting her breakfast and told myself that this is not how the rest of my day is going to go. Then I started thinking of all the things I am thankful for; my kids health, our full refrigerator, my full classes, cinnamon Eggo waffles (LOL!)....and so on...

My day has already picked up......
Makenna is in a good mood, I got the laundry started, I managed to respond to all of my emails, and be able to write on my blog. No, my headache is not gone. All I have to do is get up and take some advil and I will be fine. The problem is that I don't want to get up. I guess it is just that kind of day. Hey...my writers block must be gone...yeah!

One Million Dollars

I took a little survey and asked my closest friends and some family members what they would do if they were given a large sum of money. Almost all of them had paying off their debts, giving to charity, a new home or car, some said new clothes, a vacation and so on. Of course I expected everyone to say they wanted to full-fill their dreams. And for most, their dreams were simple and easier to achieve than they think.

My sister-in-law gave me this book titled The Secret. It took me 3 days to read it. It can be considered a self help book although I rather consider it a "life help" book. Everyone needs to read this book if they are stuck in a rut, not happy with their life or do not see any of their dreams coming true. Why? Because it tells you what you need to do in order to have whatever it is you want in life.

After reading it, I took a long hard look at all that I achieved in the last few months. Then I asked myself...."how the heck did I do that?" In some small way I already knew "The Secret" and was living it.

I started with no money, just a dream that a good friend of mine and I chatted about one day. I told her and myself that I was going to do this. Let me just tell you, people thought I was CRAZY! This was in August of 2008 that I came up with the idea of having a Scrapbooking Inn. Now, my complete dream has not yet totally come true since I do not have my Inn...yet. But it will, it is only a matter of time. When you read The Secret it will tell you to ask the universe for what you want....see yourself in that situation, feel yourself there and believe that it will happen. And, if you ask for something and it happens the next day it would be too soon.

So, I made my dream start happening with nothing but a bunch of notes, ideas, and support from family and friends. It was amazing to me that by December 7th, my store was open. Do you realize that it was only 4 months from when I decided I was going to do this? Here, I was already living the Secret to life. Now, that I have realized that I was in charge of creating the dream job I wanted, I can create anything that I truly want in life. So the question I have to ask is...what am I going to do with a million dollars? Believe it or not, I already have that answer. It is for me to know and you to find out....eventually.

How much I adore my kids....

I am not sure if it is because Valentine's Day is coming up or what, but I am sitting here admiring my daughter and I cannot help but to think how much I adore her. We are on our third round of watching the movie Jimmy Neutron, playing Legos and snacking. Her facial expressions and her actions are just so cute. Maybe it is her hair style today. She wanted two buns in her hair, for the first time ever. God she looks adorable. As I sat here with her, I just kept thinking of all the reasons I adore her so much. I have narrowed it down to 10 because there are just too many to mention.

10.} I adore the way she talks, her politeness and manners.

9,} The way she lights up and dances when she hears music or sees dancing and figure skating on TV.

8.} The way she shrugs her shoulders and smiles when she sees an animal of any kind.
7.} Because she is so concerned when someone doesn't feel well and she tries to take care of them. And, she does not like to see someone upset at all.
6.} Because she tries to help me fill and empty the dish washer, fold the laundry, vacuum and dust.

5.} I adore the way she looks at nature. Her smile when she sees a flower, she jumps up and down when she sees a sunset and yells with laughter when she sees and hears the geese in the sky.
4.}I adore the fact that she is always cleaning up litter. It doesn't matter where we are, she is already concerned about keeping the earth green.
3.} I adore the compassion she has for her brother. And all the affection and excitement she shows him.

2.} I adore the fact that she will just wrap her little arms around me and squeeze! She is very affectionate.
1.}When she says, "Mommy, I just love you soooooooo much!"

When it comes to my son, I am so proud of the child he has become. With all that he has had to deal with in his little life, he really turn out to be a good kid. Here are 10 reasons I adore him so much.

10.} His love for books, playing games with us, his love for the pool, and any moment that he can share with family.

9.} I adore his compassion for his sister and his willingness to help her with anything she needs.

8.} I adore his silliness and his effort in trying to make everyone around him laugh.

7.} Because he tries so hard to make everyone happy.
6.} Because he is already concerned about the welfare of others and the fact that not everyone is as lucky as he is.

5.}I adore his excitement when he gets to go shopping with his Grammy.

4.} His compassion for animals and children.
3.} That simple things make him happy.
2.} I adore his hugs and kisses and the fact that he is very affectionate. It is so funny when he says, "You're the best mom ever!"
1.} He never leaves or goes to bed without saying he loves me.

Now those are reasons to make someone grateful. My kids are my world, I only hope that they know that.

Thank You

Tonight I could complain of my sore throat, low-grade fever, and major fatigue....but I am not. Besides, I nipped it in the bud and went to the doc right away. Thanks to my mom who was able and willing to keep an eye on the store, I was able go. These are the times that I think, how lucky I am to have family close by and willing to help out when needed? Not many people are as lucky to be able to have such wonderful parents. So, instead of complaining I am going to be thankful....thank God for doctors, medicine, and that I am not feeling as bad as someone worse off than me.

Speaking of being thankful......
There were times in the past that I had to move back home, get a hand me down car, and start all over. Those times were very tough on me. Not because I was moving back home but because of the reason I had to move. Not because I had to drive a car that I really didn't care for, but because I had to get rid of the one I loved. Every time I felt that I was on my way to feeling complete, something happened that took me back to having to start all over. It really makes one appreciate what they do have and the ones who stood by your side the entire time.

What I am thankful for today....
I am thankful for all the times my friends gave me a ride, let me stay with them, let me cry on their shoulder, gave me money when I was broke, loved Gavin as if he were their own child, loved me even when I hated myself.

I am thankful for all the wonderful things my parents did to help me raise my son. I am thankful that they allowed me to come back home, gave me a roof over my head, a car to drive, food, money, and respected me as a mother. They not only took me under their roof, but my son and my pets. It just shows you that parents will do anything to help out their child when their child is in need.....at any age. I could never in words express how grateful I am for what they did.

Because of these wonderful people in my life, I am where I am today. I am thankful for what I have. My car is not my dream car, my house is not my dream house, and I really could use a new wordrobe.....however......at least I have a car, a home and clothes to wear....these are all material anyway. What matters most to me is the happiness and health of my children, the moments we get to share together and with our family. What makes me happy is to give to someone else, even if it is only a smile to brighten their day. I have my parents to thank for that.

I hope that my children grow up to be giving, respectful and caring of others. If I can achieve that than I have done my job. I want them to know that life is not about the things we can buy, but the things we can give to others. Life is not about us, it is about what we can do to make other people's lives better. I feel that those who only ever think of themselves are the ones who end up alone....just what I have seen through out the years. I want my children to feel as loved, appreciated, and full-filled as I do thanks to all of my friends and family. I know that because of all the wonderful people in my life, that I can achieve anything and I will never be alone. I thank God for everyone who is in my life.

Santa Claus, Tickety Tock and Mike Wasowski

My loving husband bought our daughter a talking Santa. Or, should I call it an answering Santa? When you ask this Santa certain questions it will answer you. It is very very cute....at least for the first five minutes. I am sure you are guessing right...no it doesn't have an OFF switch. Don't you just love those kind of toys? One thing about my husband is that he lives for sales and clearance items. Oh, I forgot to mention YARD SALES! He has calmed down a lot since we have gotten together. Maybe he is tired of going through all of his bins in the attic?

Well, there is a standing joke with my mom that my step-grandmother Edna makes toys go off. It is probably because she was fun and silly and loved animals and children. She never had any of her own. Yes, she has passed. In fact it was only matter of a month or two that she passed after my grandfather {see yesterday's blog}. I remember when I lived with my parents after my divorce to my sons father, going down to the basement to do laundry. The basement was where my son had his playroom. One thing I didn't mention in yesterdays story is that my grandfather also was an avid picture taker (I won't say photographer since he was not professional) and he also painted. His paintings were mostly of Edna. Down in the basement my parents had one of his paintings of Edna. Almost every time I passed this painting I said hello to her and told her I missed her. This particular day I came up the stairs and faintly heard something talking. Now, thankfully my mother was there so I knew I was not hearing things. Cautiously I walked down the stairs to hear it again. It was my sons Tickety Tock from Blue's Clues. You must know that it says a number of phrases. However, on this day all it would say is, "Hi, I am Tickity!" Laughing, I told my mom that I had said hi to Edna's painting. We both agree that she was saying Hi back.

Another time when I was vacuuming, home all alone, I hear a faint noise. So, I turn off the vacuum, to hear, "I've got my eye on you!" You can imagine the goose bumps I got at that moment. I knew my son had a Mike Wasowski talking toy from Monsters Inc....love that movie! It said the same comment again. Like the Tickety Tock, it says about 5 different phrases. This time I was determined to make this thing stop. I was thinking...ok, something is laying on top of it to make it do that. The batteries must be dying....etc. I take it out of the toy box and sit it on top of it. I start vacuuming again to hear this thing say, "I've got my eye on you." Out loud, I said, "Ok Edna, I get it....you've got your eye on me." It stopped. (No, I didn't take out the batteries and I didn't get rid of it either....the thought did cross my mind.)

Then came this morning. The talking Santa laying on the back of the couch. I am sitting there thinking....will Makenna notice if I hide it until next year? I didn't have the heart to hide Santa even though I was not looking forward to it answering again. I sit down with my coffee to check my email which is my daily morning routine once Gavin is off to school. Makenna is a late sleeper so I always have time to myself in the morning. So, Santa starts talking.....and talking....and I cannot get this thing to shut up! So, I run it into the mudroom and stuck a bunch of coats on top of it. Do you know that this thing went off all day?!?!?!?! My thought now is.......Edna must have loved yesterdays blog....a lot! I just wish she would pick less annoying toys.

It's Cold In Here and I am the lucky one!

For most of you who know me, you know that I am not sceptic about life after death, ghosts, and things to that nature. Some may think I am nuts which is perfectly ok since sometimes I am...LOL! Honestly I really do not care about the negative opinions of others at this point in my life. What I care about is what I feel, experience and what is real to me.

Sitting here on my laptop working on my website, the room suddenly got 'still'. Yes, that is the only way I can describe it and no I am not drinking. I stopped typing only to feel like someone was blowing cold air on the right side of my body. And, it lasted for well over 10 seconds. Of course I am looking at everything that could be moving because of this 'wind'. However, the only thing moving was the hair on my arm. (Two of my cats were also on my bed....not even flinching.) Now my thoughts wander to ....which one of you is it this time? Yes, I do know that I am guided through life by all of my loved ones who have passed on. They let me know all the time that they are there. Consider me lucky since I am at peace with the idea that they are not really gone from me. Not many people experience the feelings I get, which may scare some people. I absolutely live for it. It makes me aware of the fact that death is not the end. It is just the end for our bodies.

I am trying to become more aware of their presence by stopping the moment I feel something instead of going on with whatever I am involved with. I take the moment to thank them and make them aware that I know they are there. Lately my grandfather has been speaking to me through the gift of writing. I actually forgot how good it feels to just sit down and write about my day. My grandfather was ALWAYS writing; stories, poetry, letters, you name it. I was the lucky one who inherited all of his writings. Most people would just toss it all aside, maybe even throw it out. Me...well it took me about 5 years to actually read it....mostly because it made me cry everytime I did. When it came down to it, I missed him. This Christmas I decided to open that drawer full with the memories, love letters and poetry that filled my grandfathers life and do something creative with it. This is where my scrapbooking comes in hand. What am I going to do with the piles of paper in my hands, most in which I could not read. Some were faded, disinigrating in front of my eyes because they had aged. Mostly I could not read some because my grandfather had the worst handwriting. Lucky for me, some were typed.

My wonderful neighbor Diane came rushing over when I asked her for help reading these. I needed an extra pair of eyes....at least. Once I photo copied some originals that I knew would never make it a couple more years, I had gathered enough to complete one full scrapbook for my father. The poems and letters that were hand written I typed up so that they were legable. In the scrapbook album I included my typed version and a photo copy of my grandfathers. My feelings are that it is always a gift when you see the handwritting of a love one who has passed.....even if you cannot read it.

There are no pictures in this book. Really, you do not need any. When you read my grandfathers writing, you see, feel, smell, and taste everything he writes about. Don't worry, he did write about food since he went out for dinner every single night. How he lived to be in his 80's I can say must have been his one true love. It certainly was not his diet.

I did manage to make a scrapbook for my brother as well. They were not identical but very much alike. I knew that he would appreciate the gift just as much as my dad. On Christmas day, the scrapbooks were one of the last two gifts given out. I had my dad and brother open them at the same time. I was not surprised when my brother busted out in tears. However, I was surprised that my dad reached for his hanky...ya know, red bandana in the back pocket. I swear he has had them all his life. It takes a lot for my father to cry....or at least in front of anyone. I look around the room to see everyone has tears but no idea what my dad and my brother had received. See, in my family once one person cries you can pretty much bet that most people in the room will join them....or leave. When my brother said the words, "This is a scrapbook of my grandfathers unpublished poetry"....the tissues started being handed out. Both of them thanked me in their tearful, shaky voices. I know they will appreciate it even more once they read it all. One of the poems my grandfather wrote was from 1939.

Now, the spiritual side to this is something my father told me and my neighbors a few days after Christmas. We were sitting at my neighbors table when Diane asked my dad if he liked his gift. My dad responded by saying that it was the best gift ever....wow, I didn't expect that! Anyway, he mentioned that he still could not read it because it was still to painful for him. However, he did manage to read the first couple in the book when he first opened it. My dad proceeded to tell us that a couple days before Christmas he decided to route through some of my grandfathers poetry...I am thinking....THERE'S MORE! Dad was specifically looking for a certain poem titled I'm Goin' Down to Wassergass. Despite his efforts, he could not find it and gave up looking. Then comes Christmas day. My dad opens his scrapbook to see that the first poem in the book is titled, I'm Goin' Down to Wassergass.

In closing, I will say that your loved ones who are no longer here on earth, speak through you...if you listen. My grandfather had everything to do with me putting that poem first in that book. He knew my dad was looking for it.

Icy Day

Due to the icy conditions...last night I decided to not open the store today. It ended up being a good thing since my daughter Makenna woke up with hand foot and mouth disease....again. Hopefully having the day with her and staying home will help her get some rest to feel better. If your children have ever had this then you know how much it stinks. There is nothing you can do for it and sometimes it lasts a month. This is her 3rd time with this disease.

Looking out my window today it looks so white and pretty. I had the opportunity to walk to work yesterday while it was snowing. It was quiet, bright white, and serene. It reminded me of when I was a child......

I used to sled down my parents very steep hill. When I got to the bottom, I would just lay in the snow taking in all the beauty around me. The sky was so blue, there were no sounds of birds or any life around. I remember thinking 'how much I wish I had more moments like this.' Then I realized that I had to walk back up the hill and the moment was over. For some reason, the hill doesn't look nearly as big now as it did when I was a kid. However, now it is much more difficult to walk up...what is up with that?

Day time classes

Today I actually sat down and thought about what I would teach if I were to teach a class. With the interest in day time classes growing, and knowing I am usually the only one there during the day.......hmmmm...not a bad idea.

The decision was not hard on the first project since there it was in front of me. The other day I decided to take scraps that I had of our recycled paper by Jillibean Soup and 'do something' with it. One thing you must know about me is that I hate waste. Within a couple of seconds I had this bright idea to create all-occasion mini cards. It seriously took me under 5 minutes for each card. And, they are adorable and easy to do. YEAH! I have an idea!

Then surffing the net I am trying to go out of my box and journal more. So here I am looking up quick and easy things to create to include journaling and pictures. Now, I have not yet created one myself but it looks simple. My second choice is an Accordion Tag Album. I love making tags and decorating them with ribbon and emellishments.

The best thing about each of these projects is that they can be used for any occasion and for any theme.

What I am thankful for today.....the gift of imagination.

Today....

Today....let me think. I did get some phone calls today from new people signing up for classes and some new customers in the store. I am pondering the thought of when would be a good time to tweek my hours a bit since we seem to be very slow in the mornings. There was a request for classes during the day when children are in school. It isn't really something I gave thought too since my daughter is always with me during the day. It would not be hard at all to find someone to watch her. How many people would actually be able to come in during the day? This may be a new poll I should take. So far there has been no problems getting new people in the store. However, they are usually only available in the evenings or weekends.

Interesting enough I have had run-ins with girls I went to school with. Girl's I have not seen since. It is great to see all that everyone has accomplished since high school. It's hard to believe it is only 2 years until our 20th anniversary. I will not say reunion since our class only ever had a disappointing 5th....so I heard. It is hard to believe that I once ran away from Hellertown and now I am not only living here and raising my kids here but also starting my business here. I have had to learn to put small towns in perspective....the rumors fly, everyone knows everyone, and yes it sucks sometimes. However, when it all comes down to it...it is just like family. If anything were to ever happen to anyone, we would do anything for each other. I am glad however that I left for a few years.